Shelmina Babai Abji is on a mission to advance gender equality in leadership roles and her initiative to uplift mentees this International Women’s Day.
This interview has been edited for length and clarity
Shelmina Babai Abji @straightupshelmina
Shelmina Babai Abji started with humble beginnings in Tanzania and went from being the first in her family to graduate college to becoming one of the highest-ranking women of color at IBM while raising her two children as a single mother. She is a bestselling author, renowned international public speaker, former IBM VP, angel investor, and first-generation college graduate.
What does being a feminist mean to you?
Being an advocate for women to have equal opportunities as men in every walk of life. Based on where I can have maximum impact, I have decided to be an advocate for gender equality in leadership roles. I want women to be present in every room where decisions are made. When our voices are heard at every level of leadership in public and private sectors, we can influence systemic changes. We will be visible as leaders and will chisel away at the negative stereotypes and biases that currently exist in our workplaces and elsewhere.
What inspired you to write your book, "Show Your Worth: 8 Intentional Strategies for Women to Emerge as Leaders at Work"?
I grew up in humble beginnings in Tanzania and was the first person in my family to obtain a college degree because I was determined to lift myself and my family out of poverty. This was a lofty dream as it required me to leave home at the age of 15 since there was no education past tenth grade, no one in our family had been to college and we had no money. Families like us did not qualify for bank loans so my mom took a loan from a lady in our community whose name was Khursa Masi.
My journey brought me to the United States to get a degree in computer science from the University of Wisconsin-LaCrosse. As a foreign student with a one-year work visa, I was very fortunate to get a job with a technology startup company called ETA Systems. Their offer of $27,000 was more money than my parents could make in 10 years. I was ecstatic. I had no idea how many internal and external barriers I would face in navigating career success.
While I did the hard work of turning these barriers into opportunities for learning and growing, I had many people who helped me. I learned the power of relationships and especially mentoring, and became one of the highest-ranking women of color at IBM. I achieved this success while single handedly raising my two children as a single mom since they were 2 and 4. I led global teams and delivered $1B in annual revenues. I was also a mentor to others at work and outside of work. Every-time I had an opportunity to help someone succeed, I felt like I was honoring the people that had helped me- both personally and professionally.
Through mentoring hundreds of women and sharing my insights with audiences at colleges, conferences and companies, I recognized that they were facing the same internal and external barriers that I did. Many women, especially single mothers, immigrant women, women of color, women from underprivileged backgrounds and first-generation college graduates told me that I gave them hope. And that feeling brought me immense satisfaction. The more women I was able to help, the more it inspired me to do more. They inspired me to write a book so I could share my insights with more women globally and become an advocate for gender equality in leadership roles.
You mention there are many internal and external barriers for women in reaching their full potential. Can you share some of the barriers you’ve faced and elaborate on how your work helps foster an environment where all individuals, regardless of gender, can thrive?
When I started my career, I was the only woman of color in an organization of 2000 Engineers. I was also undereducated compared to others, underprivileged in my economic status, and under proficient in the language and culture. I compared myself to other and started undermining myself, undervaluing my opinion, and underestimating my worth. This instilled fear of speaking up. However, I also knew that the only way I would keep my dream alive of never being poor again was to become difficult to replace – otherwise my company would not go through the process of extending my visa. This forced me to face my fear, find my voice and contribute such unique value that they decide to extend my visa.
Here is my TedX Talk to help anyone who is afraid of speaking up. My work is focused on helping career women recognize their worth and show it to maximize their leadership potential.
One of your tips for career success is to “intentionally focus your attention on your highest priorities, moving from being busy to productive.” What’s your advice on how to make the most of our time when our to-do lists are a mile long?
The biggest difference between successful and highly successful people is how they allocate their most valuable and limited resource: their attention.
To determine where to allocate your attention, you must first intentionally define what success means to you and then determine your highest priorities that will move you fastest towards your success. You then structure your days around these priorities so you are making meaningful progress towards your success. This automatically means you say no to lesser priorities.
In your book, you have a chapter dedicated to intentional work-life balance so women can thrive in their work and life. Can you tell us more about this?
Our careers don’t define us even if we love what we do. There’s so much more to us than that. We’re mothers, daughters, sisters, friends, volunteers, caregivers, and more. Each of our roles gives meaning to our lives, and all vie for our limited attention and energy. Work-life balance means something different to everyone, but in essence, it’s the state of equilibrium where a person prioritizes the demands of their career and personal life.
In order to even begin to achieve work-life balance you must first
Believe that you can achieve work-life balance
Nurture and protect your inner well being
Create a narrative of learning and growing for every challenge.
After that use the strategy of intentional attention to both work and life.
You talk about the importance of setting boundaries and saying "No". Why is learning how to say “No” so important for us and how does it relate to your mission to create gender and racial equality in leadership roles?
In order for us to create maximum impact, we must structure our days around our highest priorities which automatically means we say ‘no’ to lesser priorities. Many women are afraid to say no, but they shouldn’t be. They can think of it this way: when you say ‘no’ to a lesser priority, you are essentially saying ‘yes’ to a higher priority which will enable you to move faster towards your success which translates to the success of your boss and your overall organization. This also applies to my mission of advancing gender equality in leadership roles. I focus my time and energy on whatever creates maximum impact and say “No” to everything else.
Could you tell us about your International Women’s Day initiative to support mentees this year?
As we celebrate this month, I am reminded of the importance of lifting other women as we rise. I am reaching out to my networks to make a request to lift their mentee. I know for sure that I would not have achieved this level of success if I did not have mentors that cared enough about me to take their precious time to mentor me.
At the age of 15, I left my home to pursue higher education and lift my family out of poverty. It wasn't until my mentor Susan Whitney told me I had potential that I started seeing myself as a leader. Her encouragement inspired me to dream bigger and achieve more.
To make International Women’s Day theme of #inspiringinclusion a reality, I am asking everyone to show their mentees they see leadership potential in them by gifting them my book, SHOW YOUR WORTH: 8 Intentional Strategies for Women to Emerge as Leaders at Work. My book has already helped thousands of women emerge as leaders and it will do the same for their mentees. If we join forces, we can truly inspire inclusion in leadership roles and become the change we want to see in our workplaces.
